Jessica, 21, Sydney.

Jessica is a third year Journalism/International Studies student at the University of Technology, Sydney. She takes photos mostly just for fun and does not for a second claim to be any good at it. Most of the time, Jess thinks about food, her hazy job prospects in the media industry and deciding whether she should hit the gym or take a nap.

Jess is also open to the prospect of collaborations/writing for you/taking photos for you/friendly conversation!
Email her at mailtojessicayun@gmail.com. She will endeavour to get back to you almost instantaneously, because no one ever emails her. x

And you shall receive.

I hate
Aug 14, 2010 @ 8:03 PM
I hate feeling so inadequate. I hate feeling like I wasn't good enough. I hate feeling worthless, insignificant, invisible. I hate feeling bitter, like everything meant nothing, even though that's not true. I hate that you fucking forgot me in a month and engraved another's name in your heart in the next. I hate that she has the same fucking name as me. I hate that I still think about you every day, and I don't mean to, you're just There All The Time. I hate that I KNOW that you're NOT thinking about me and I'm wasting my fucking time.

I hate that I can't write this on my blog because I'm stupid and I go and mouth it off to everyone within my vicinity to read it so now I can't post personal shit cause everyone else will be fucking stalking me and reading my QQing and shit so I CAN'T qq, or else people will TALK and I want everyone to fuck off. I hate how I remember reading this on other people's blog and thinking how ..strange it was, and wondering/concluding that I'd never be in that position.

I hate so much that I tried to work things out with you, even when we were done a long time ago. I hate that I'm fine, I hate how okay I am without you. I hate that you're even fucking better, you have someone else.

Most of all, I'm so glad that all this hate will end up being past tense. Because I love me. I love myself, I'm going to treat myself better and focus on ME and patch myself up, because I've learnt now. I need to love and support myself first, before I do it for anyone else. I realised that that was my mistake when I was with you. I put too much pressure on you to make me happy, when all along it was literally in my own hands.

But I won't stop hating that you never said any of this to me. That you never ..made any effort. That when you did, I didn't appreciate it or I didn't see it.

This is just my mini in-the-heat-of-the-moment rant post. I feel this way right NOW, but I won't feel like this the next day, I tell you. I never go a day without smiling & that's a fact.

I'm beautiful. I know this, because you said so yourself.

I hate, but I love so much more.

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